I graduate tomorrow...

   

     So,
            I am laying here and as tired as I am, I can not sleep. I feel excited, happy, nervous and sad. I can't believe this part of my life is over. I can not wrap my head around the fact that I worked so hard all of the years I was in school and now it's over. It will never ever be like it didn't happen; I have to many emotional scars to prove to myself that it did, and some physical ones to go along with the emotional. I remember starting high school. I was terrified. I did not know how I was going to go through what seems to be the longest four years of your life without my best friend, but I did. I made it through the storm and I made it through in one piece, well mostly anyway. That was four years ago but it feels like two weeks ago. It feels like I was just on my way home from orientation crying because I was going to do this without anyone and I had to do it and I would; and I did. I remember feeling it was going to be impossible and then freshmen year was over and I survived it, and I was alright and I was going to continue to be, even after having my world shattered by my first love. For those of you who don't know or haven't experienced it yet, imagine having not just your world but you down to the core of your being, being shattered and your world literally falling apart. I had to not only put myself back together but I had to find out who I was again, when I had just figured it out. I told myself that if I could get through that, I could get through anything and I can. Sophomore year was  pretty uneventful besides my moving to Germany. Junior year was hard for me emotionally but as of the work and classes it wasn't awful and I was so stoked to have one more year left and now that year is over. Senior year, was by far the easiest when it comes to everything, emotional, physical and school. I moved back to America but I was so excited about that I almost kissed the tar mat when we landed. The work was not hard, the change was easy to deal with and I for the most part, had a good time senior year but now it's all over. The four years I thought I could never do, the four years I looked forward to when I was in fourth grade, going I only have five years until I am in high school and then nine until I am done and now I am done with high school and I will. I am so excited but so nervous!!
-Kaylan

Tomorrow is my LAST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL!

Like the title says,

Tomorrow is my last day of high school and I'm honestly kinda mixed about it. I am excited, sad, happy, and anxious! I am just so, overwhelmed with emotion. It doesn't seem real... at all. I just... am.... yeah lol I don't know. I've got a blog planned after graduation, it's going to be... monumental, at least for me! I'm kind of taking my last "school night" in. I am going to dress up tomorrow though, I want... I want to look cute and feel good about myself, walking out my high school doors for the last time as a student. I have senior assembly on Friday but it's not really that big for me, I won't be in the slideshow but that's fine I suppose. I've been to four high schools in my entire 4 years in high school so not being known is not new for me and it honestly doesn't bother me. There is to much about to happen for me, and to much that I am going to do in my life to worry about not being in the senior slide show. Yeah, I was cute kid, so why do I need to put all of them to shame with my adorable baby/toddler/kid self? Psh, It's alright, I'll let them keep their self-esteems. :p Anyway, a few of my friends want me to go so that is why I am going mainly, it's not going to be all teary eyed for me or anything, graduation will be for me. I don't have any real connections to any high schools, I went to Schweinfurt for the longest but I hated it so I'm not really sad to not be graduation from there. I have more ties to Pickering. I grew up in Louisiana, well Louisiana and Mississippi but I spent most of my school years there. I was there in preschool-8th grade (not counting 1st, was in Mississippi) I spent 10 years at school in Pickering and I would have known the people I was graduating with and it would have meant so much more to me. The Lord had other plans though and I ended right here, where my life began for the first time, and now it's beginning again; metaphorically speaking of course. This chapter in my life is over and I am starting something totally new, completely new uncharted territory for me. College, and then the rest of my life. It wont be long I'm sure when I look back on my life and think "When did I become my mother?" (Hopefully in some ways I won't) I'm kind of sad but at the same time I know the part of my life I am about to start is going to be so much rewarding for me and I am going to enjoy it so much more than the dreaded middle school and high school years. I wasn't one of those super popular kids and I always had issues trying to fit in somewhere, I never seemed to, even with my friends, I only have one person who has ever gotten me totally and she is not with me all the time, though she is coming down for graduation. The kids who are super popular in high school and have a great time, that's awesome for them but that will probably be there peak in life and I haven't even begun to have mine but once I do, it will be amazing and it will last for the rest of my life hopefully. I am so looking forward to college and I think I will love it, so I am praying I am right. Anyway, I think I have given you enough to read for tonight, so I am going to get off here...
Have a great night!
-Kaylan

"Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together" -Marilyn Monroe

Last Monday and Exemptions!

Hey Ya'll


So this is actually kinda cool because I'm blogging from school! I am in second block of the day (we have four) and I am exempt from this class so I can sleep all block or play on the computer, I choose to play on the computer! This is the last day I will have this class though, the last time I will have a first and second block to go to! It's bittersweet. I'm excited, happy, sad, nervous, scared and so much more; with graduation being so close I am looking back on the things I wish I could have done, the things I wish I wouldn't have done and the things I would go back and change in a second if I could. I didn't have a great high school experience but there have been worse I am more than certain of that. I've been to four high schools and four years, moved from the south to north (never having been out of the south) and then to another country and I've managed (mostly anyway) to hold myself together and I've gotten through it with my best friend and some other good friends I've made along the way.
We made cookies in my art class aka my first block and I was like yummy! I'll insert a photo for ya'll when I get home. I am also making ice cream in my fourth block so yummy!!!
I do not have to be here tomorrow at all! But I do have to be here on Wednesday to take my third block exam, but I am not worried and I'm confident that I will do well and it will help my grade for sure!
Anyway, sorry the unusually long blog but thanks for reading!!!
Have a spiffy day!

-Kaylan


"The only limitations you have are the ones you give yourself" -Steven Harper

Last Week of High School..

Ya'll

I am not sure how to feel about this.... I'm so excited and so sad at the same time. I can't wait to be done but there are so many things I would go back and do differently. I moved 4 times in high school, that was hard enough, through the classes, friends, enemies, teachers, rude people, tears etc... I am just... I don't know how to feel about this... and next week is graduation! I want to cry just thinking about it!!!

My SENIOR prom today!

Hey ya'll!

I just wanted to make this quick little blog! Prom is today and I could not be more excited! I have waited so long for this and it's finally here!! I've got the perfect dress, and the perfect shoes. The sun is shining and it's beautiful outside! I just could NOT be any happier than I am right now! Well I hope ya'll proms, whenever they are either are amazing or were amazing!
Love ya'll!
-Kaylan

Prom, Graduation, School

So yesterday on the 13th of April, I went dress shopping for prom, I ended up going to 4 different places and I got to the last place within 30 minutes of them closing and I ended up walking out of there having purchased a dress I am IN LOVE with and I am not SO EXCITED for prom! The dress is simple but it's beautiful  I can not wait to share it with ya'll! I won't be posting pictures though until after prom! Sorry!! Anyway, yesterday was nothing short of amazing! My mom and I had a day to ourselves that we desperately needed... We had breakfast and then went shopping, stopped at Sonic for a limemade and then continued, once we were done dress shopping we purchased the two different pairs of shoes I will be wearing, and the jewelry as well as the clutch. We went to eat and then to walmart and did not end up getting home until 12:12am... We were exhausted!!! Anyway, moving on! So Graduation is in 30 days ( not counting weekends) and counting... I am doing everything I can to make sure my grades stay up and that I do well. School is alright though, I am excited to be done though! I just can't wait!
Have an awesome day!!
-Kaylan

Meridian, Spring Break, & Partying (:

Hey Ya'll!

So I am on spring break! Woot!! And I am in Meridian with my Aunt to help her with my cousin. Alyssa who is eight, has a hard time when she is away and since I am so nice and on vacation I am here with them for three days, we were here Tuesday, Wednesday and we will be here for some of tomorrow and then we are going to get my other little cousin Allie from her mamas and then we are heading home and I will have Thursday night, Friday, Saturday and Sunday at home and I will be spending it with some new friends and a new guy I met, as Tj and I are no longer together, I just didn't announce it because it wasn't a big deal, we just decided not to be together anymore as we were no longer working but hey, it's life and I've moved on and he and I are great friends.! Well anyway, yeah I am excited to get back and I can't wait to graduate!! I hope ya'll having a great night!
-Kaylan

 

The last nine weeks, research paper & 47 days!

Hey ya'll!

Like normal I've been busy with school and everything I have to do afterwards, but I wanted to blog to tell ya'll I contacted the woman I want to do my senior portraits and I am so excited!! Plus, prom is in a little over a month and while I am super excited I am also kind of sad because this will be my LAST high school event besides graduation, which I'm not sure counts! Ha! I remember being in 9th grade and promising myself I was going to go to football games and hangout with friends and go to parties and I not ONE time did any of those things, I've had a very boring high school career but I suppose that's better than having a bad one.
With graduation only 47 days I am really starting to look back and wishing I'd done things differently and realizing the things I have to do now to get my life on track after high school and it's scary.! I feel like I just started my senior year and it's almost over! I could cry, but not yet, I am sure I will cry plenty on graduation day!

Weekend!

This weekend is going to be better than most! I am determined!! Lol! The week was short but it was a very long week emotionally and I'm so glad to not have to deal with these people for two days!! Woot Woot! I am going mudding today with one of my good friends and I'm excited as I've never been. The only thing is it's gonna be a bit chilly today I have to make sure to bring something to cover my arms even though I'm sure I wont need it for long! I hope everyone's week was good and that everyone enjoys their weekend!
Have a great day!!
-Kaylan

Just Blogging

Things have been going well for the most part, the days go by faster at school the closer graduation gets here! Prom is in April and I am browsing online for the type of dress I want. I am ordering my class ring soon as well and will hopefully have it asap once it's actually ordered, I am also going to email a woman about my senior portraits so I can put out graduation invites! I am getting so excited to be done with school, the only thing I am worried about at the moment is my research paper because I literally have been there for zero of it but I am going to have to start picking it up and working on it! I remember my first blog a couple days before school started and I am just shocked at how fast time has flown by. I am down to 3 months as of today till graduation and that is so crazy to me! I just am beyond excited! I could cry! I have waited for this for so long and I have so many feelings regarding this, I feel excited, scared, relieved, worried and all of the emotions you can think of but it's a good thing. I am ready to spread wings, the only question is if my parents will let me go :p
Anyway, I am off to bed!
Have a great night!